GRADUATED

Assalamualaikum,

Surprisingly, I could only write at night. All the ideas poured out like a heavy rain after a long summer.

Last June, I attended my graduation ceremony which was held at IPG Kampus Bahasa Melayu which also known as IPBM. After 5 and a half year of studying, I finally got the opportunity to wear my own graduation robe and hold a bouquet of flowers. Let me break a secret, I bought the bouquet for myself for the sake of nice graduation pictures.

Deep in my heart, I really hoped that someone so close to me would buy a bouquet of roses for me as I walked out the graduation hall. Dream remained as a dream. Let it goooooo!!!! I had no plan to further in master's degree since I just think that I had had enough.

I had no passion in teaching as much as I had no passion to entertain my pupils and to prepare teaching aids. LOL.

I had started doing extra money on the fourth month of working. I held a can on my right hand and taught English. I felt contented coz the pupils really learnt the lesson. They did their work with a good manner. That's my passion. Teaching...not multi-tasking.

Apart from that, I wished to see F's face on my graduation day. It was unfair for my parents and family members if I said, he's one of the catalyst for me to finish up my degree. hahahah. My source of strength apart from my family members.

Ironically, he was thousand miles far away from this land.

Congratulations to me!!!!!!

xoxo                                                                 

our first house

assalamualaikum,

Right now, I realized why people often said savor each and every moment while you've no commitment. My current commitment is my future. When I am alone in my room, I keep on thinking about my life. What would happen if I do this and that? I shall stop for a moment and think about my ibadah once.

Dear my future children,

All of you should know that we planned to buy a house this year. The decision had been made. At first, we decided to buy a house somewhere near to my workplace in Gelang Patah, JohorBahru. I'd done some research and drove 20 km distance from my home just to find the suitable places to buy a house. I came home with a very bad headache. I was not good at making a decision. F kept on saying I should work hard for this but being woman, I'd had so much in my mind. One day, we're going to move to Japan and who will take care of our house during that period of time?

On Sunday night, I felt overwhelmed and I cried and I decided to throw tantrums. Luckily, your future father was very smart and cool. He told me to stop for a moment and left everything to him for this time being.

House hunting was a serious deal. Imagined, we would spend a quite big amount of money for a house. It won't be a comfortable house since our budget was very limited. We decided to go for a house ranging from 100k to 200k only since both of us has just started working. It's gonna be a god investment for our future little family.

Right now, We have short-listed a few houses in Sungai Petani. I really hope that the house will be ours. Our first house. Our first experience. Our first big decision. Our first investment. May Allah grant us patient and guide us through it.

Hurmmm, we actually had a very limited amount of money but we decided to just take the risk. We believed that It'll be a great start for us in this field; property investment.

Our journey was not as easy as we always imagined. We started from zero. We fell in love 7 years ago and we had to find our own pocket money for wedding. The decision of buying a house was actually a stepping stone to our big day. One day, we'll surely tell all of you. Don't worry, we'll set a good foundation for all of you and my kids won't have to endure the hardships we faced again.

Oppps, I have another one week for house hunting. Wish me all the best!!!! See you in a couple of years or maybe next year......

love,
me.


 

Japan Part 1: Before

Assalamualaikum,

I'm going to Japan this coming December. Since, I'm no longer own a diary, I shall save all the memories here. The idea evolved when we finally decided not to get married this year due to a few reasons. I was so sad than I felt like the whole world collapsed on me. Not just I wanna get married, I also can't wait to leave this job as soon as possible. Don't tell mt parents coz they never agree with this idea. haha. Both of us agreed to the decision that we made. Both of our parents think that we're still young to venture int marriage though we both are fully ready. In fact, both of us are exited to start a mew life as husband and wife. Allah knows well, I surrender to Him and to every decision. It won't change my feeling on him.

The decision has been made by the King of F. I know it's difficult for him to make such decision but our path is not as easy as others. I cried a few days until I made a decision to spend the money for a vacation. It was a sudden decision. I spend three days to decide and on the third day, I bought the flight ticket. I managed to book the promotion ticket which cost me RM 1.2K. Alhamdulillah. My flight will be on Tuesday morning and schedule to arrive at 3 pm (Malaysia Time).

Spring does not last until forever, so as the happiness in life.

Malaysian currency is no longer stable. As I am typing this entry, 1 USD: RM 4. We've planned to buy Japan Railway pass since the beginning of our plan.  That is the best decision since we plan to move from one state to another. Kansai-Osaka-Nara-Kobe-Nagoya-Tokyo-Nagano. However, with the sudden drop of RM, the ticket will be a bit expensive from its actual price due to currency problem. So, I really need to work hard and get some more money for this and that.

I'm so looking forward for this vacation. I'm gonna meet lots of beautiful and kind persons who have helped F along his journey to become who he is today. Arigatou gozaimasu minna.

And, I'm going to visit our house.

We have no plan to stay in Malaysia after we get married since F wants to gain some experience there and I really love the idea of staying abroad. Yeay, at least, I have a reason to leave my current job for a while.

122 days till Japan Trip.

credits to: Bagpackers Traveller

in love

today is the day.

we addressed each other with a permanent one.....

one thing i hope.

through whatever situations, we will always remember the sacrifices we made to reach to this extend.

through whatever shortcomings, we will stay put together.

strong and firm.

alhamdulillah for another reasons for us to stay strong in this journey.

i wonder if everyday is a holiday

ni need a day off from work. . this week, the stressfulness has reached to its peak. fuhhhhh. i need a holiday. i need my best of the best partner here. to lift up my spirit.

i feel so lazy to go to work. to even iron my kurungs. to even wake up with one thing in my mind, i must go to school. sooo lazy to enter the class with almost the whole class forgot to finish up my homework. sooo lazy to get angry and shouted like pftttt. sooo lazy to walk and leave the red marks from crabby like pinch. they won't realise their mistakes. they ignored. they just closed their hearing sense to listen to my never ending babbling.

things get worst when i entered the last class. only one out of 30 finished my work. longgg sigh. i would simply say, if you would like to be a servant forever, you may continue to live happily with your current behaviours. i wouldn't mind at all. i sometimes felt so demotivated to enter their class. the only way to revise what they had learnt at school was by doing lot and lots of exercises.

tell me what i should do. slow talk..advice..rewards, canning, beat....done .  nothing change except me. i'm so closed to give up. no improvement. most of the weak pupils, they needed to learn from the basic. i mean at their own pace, but, i had 30 of them in a totally not conducive classroom. tell me how to approach one by one. to pay attention at one pupil at a time.

think twice before you fill up the teaching courses forms. you might probably end up being a housewife. how i wish coz i couldn't imagine myself in 30 years time. i might pass away due to stress which is caused by the  pupils' behaviours.

work hard, my man. i wanna quit my job tomorrow. hahahaha. dream oh dream! crayyy

day 12

alhamdulillah,

we're now in the second phase of Ramadhan. alhamdulillah. He grants us another breath to prepare ourselves for our next destination. what a cliché.. as time goes by, people are now in the midst preparing things to celebrate Syawal. we could see lots and lots of sale adverts here and there. mosques and prayer hall are no longer our fav place. people have started to plan for iftar at somewhere grand. buttt, that's not the way to celebrate this month.

i pray to Allah so he could protect me from the wonders of dunya. this is a month of ibadah. He has promised us that He 'll grant our prayers. this is a month of ibadah. this is a special month. the most awaited one.

what a waste if we use the limited time given to go shopping and do other things that we often do during other months.

with that,
mari gandakan amal ibadah!

cooking

assalamualaikum,

wow, it looked like my passion into typing had slowly gone.

ramadhan is here again. alhamdulillah, i'm blessed to be one of the pupils in this school again. this ramadhan, i celebrated in Johor. i greeted the first day of Ramadhan alone this time. my other housemates went back to their hometown leaving me alone.

i was so sad at first but the feeling slowly faded away. i took this as a training for me for a couple of years to come.

i bet most of us had already setour own plan for this Ramadhan. it would be a waste if we never took this opportunity to do something different to our timeline. Ramadhan is a month of blessing. personally, i really believe that this month will determine us for the coming 11 months. month of refreshment physically and spiritually.

and, this year is my first year of working while fasting. fuhhh, it might look easy but never for me. i deal with kids from 7a.m until 2p.m. i need to talk and teach and shout as usual. i need to re ell the same thing for sooo many times, as usual. that's so not easy. melepekla sampai rumah.

and, alhamdulillah, up until now, we are still cooking. no outside food allowed for iftar, moreh and sahur. i'm challenging myself not to visit bazar ramadhan at all for this year. i feel healthy eating homemade food. it might take a little time and energy to prepare iftar but it worth and of course, saving our monthly budget.

tarawih, there's no excuse for me to skip since i'm no longer a student. no assignment. i usually finished my work at school. home is where my bed is. so, no workloads allowed to enter my room sweet room. haha. let's see, sampai bilakah? but, we often rotate from one surau/ masjid to another. see, so many mosques around this small town. no excuses are allowed except the special break.

have a blessed ramadhan, peeps. let's aim for His blessings and mardhatillah.