Monday, 28 October 2013

on my birthday

assalamualaikum,

this one is an outdated entry.

i received the presents on my birthday. hihi. alhamdulillah. i was still in Balik Pulau when i celebrated my birthday. I never expected to get all the presents cz i never told them my birth date.

haih, they did a peek-a-boo surprise for me. haish. i didn't know where to hide myself cz i'm not used to it. i didn't know how to react. i smiled but i laughed. i hide behind them like a little girl hiding behind her mother.

the same things happened twice. malu.

thanks friends for the surprise for a not so young birthday girl.

agnes and schu made me feel elated with their present. they gave me a car transmitter. i remember telling them about something that i really needed for my car. haha. they bought it for me as birthday present. thank you so much. they helped me to save 20 ringgit with love some more.







 got scarf inside. thanks laila. 

Happy birthday to me. haha
Alhamdulillah, for the endless opportunity and chances to be a better muslim. 
I just wanna be forever 22 coz i love the number. hahahaha. next year, i need to wait another 11 years for another beautiful numbers. no!!! (kidding)


till then.

my friend got engaged.

assalamualaikum,

Sebelum Aku Bernikah.
Tajuk forum saya dan suami di Unisza, Kuala Terengganu malam ni.
Ini juga tajuk buku adinda seakidah saya, Hilal Asyraf. 

Terimbau balik nostalgia belum nikah dulu.
Mujurlah sabar sikit pada lamaran masa tahun 1 dan 2.
Meskipun 'terkesan' juga bila masyarakat sekeliling asyik tanya bila nak 'ada.'
Indahnya sabar, Dr. Farhan Hadi hadir dlm hidup masa tahun akhir.
Adik adik saya di sini....
Nikmati indahnya sabar bila insan yg kau impi belum hadir. Realistik dgn kehidupan, luaskan link.
-Ustazah Fatimah Syarha-
I was on facebook and reading a post from Ustazah Fatimah Syarha when I decided I should do some writing lah. It's my first time experiencing it. I felt bless for the opportunity. I never imagined I would witness such moment. yelah. usually, people would ask someone who has more experience and pious as a mediator. hurm. i wasn't a mediator but more to a companion.

yesterday, the one who asked me to accompany her got engaged. for that, i felt like jumping in the air.

Allah has a better plan for us. we never realized it until something miracle came to us or to be exact into our life. something miracle suddenly appeared or should I say intrude into our life. eyh macam war pulak kan. war of heart.  the process of making a finite decision  whether to accept or to reject someone into our life should be the gist of the war. Masya-Allah, she made it before me. i just couldn't believe it until I saw her standing in front of me in her purple princess-cut dress. she looked very beautiful and modest. I never saw her like that. from her smile, she looked relieved and happy.

When I reached her house, the ceremony had started. the older ones were in the house discussing about her and him as well as getting to know to each other I guess coz they never know each after before this.  her mother approached me with with a smile. she asked me, " Which one is 'the man'?". I pointed to the man and gave a mile to her. I wanted to hug her. tingginya tawakkal seorang ibu. redha dengan pilihan anak. I should learn from her how to have a strong devotion to Allah's plan.  She never knew and meet her future in law, yet, she learnt to accept. hugs.

from the inner side of me, sooner, i will be one. haha. hundred of eyes will be staring at me in awe. My mom will grasp my fingers and kiss my cheeks. wearing a happy smile. pangggg. dream oh dream. please go away a minute. let me finish this entry.

i still remember the day she told us about this beautiful story.  A villager asked her about that. ladies. when we reached at a certain age, people would start asking us about that killing question about status. aish. i dare not to say it out but i'm not good in literature and i find it's not easy to do metaphor. it's marriage. yee haa. haha.  memang 2 3 minggu ni perkataan tersebut sentiasa wujud di sini. haha. minta maap. hormonal. oh kay, let's continue! We simply said don't take it so serious. chillax arr.

from my past experience, status would be among the most famous questions for a practicum teacher. why? i don't know. ask the senior teachers and the friendly villagers as well as the talkative students.

my dear friend's story was a little bit different. a smooth sailing journey i should say. so pure.

That day, I was sitting next to a lady who came all the way from Balik Pulau. She said, "jodoh kita Allah dah sedia dan kita tak tahu je. sekarang Allah dah tunjukkan untuk A dan S."

With the big decision thankfully behind them, the bride and groom now enter their engagement period.

May Allah give them patience.

The older always said that the exciting period is crucial. It's a life changing period. You've determined that you found the right one to marry and you must stick to your decision lah. for muslim, it's a sunnah. correct me if i 'm wrong.

looking into another side of thinking, it is a period to prepare for wedding holistically, to get to know with your fiance', finishing school, getting to know fiance's family and saving money for the upcoming future.

Are they true? entah.

there are 14 of us, ladies in my class. another one down leaving us 12.

let's pray for both of them.

Dear friend,

"Seek help in patience and As-Salat (the prayer). Truly, Allah is with As-Sabirun (the patient).'' (2:153)

Let's take a look at some pictures taken by my antique compact camera.

feeling hoi. 


group photo. coming all the way from our college to witness the happiest moment in our friends' life. 

It's all about the smiles. 

p/s: i bought the coffee dress from a boutique in Kompleks Bukit Jambul for 59 ringgit. cheap and comfortable. hihi. 

till then. 












.









Saturday, 26 October 2013

balik kampung!!!!!! eh. trouble is a friend owh owh

assalamualaikum,

it's a holi holiday! Hooray! Hooray!
i've been singing the song since yesterday. haish.

but today, i just need to slow down coz there's a problem. macam biasa.

sambung lagu lenka.
Trouble he will find you no matter where you go, oh oh 
No matter if you're fast, no matter if you're slow, oh oh 
The eye of the storm or the cry in the mourn, oh oh 
You're fine for a while but you start to lose control
manusia dan sistem buatan manusia. sentiasa ada krisis.

let's start the so called sad story

it is a sad thing when someone is treating you like a boarding school student at the age of 22. old enough to wear school uniform. Should I say someone or a system. a system is invented and introduced by someone. i personally think it's a good system to protect students since bad things can happen everywhere. i know our institute's intention which is to protect us. when we're in college, we're under their supervision and control. just like a school student. when they are at school, their safety and everything that is related to them are under school's responsibilities which mean teacher and school's staffs responsibilities. if there's anything happens, they are among the first line to answer to the parents especially.

hurm, ever since the new person took charge the pose of ketua unit HEP, there're so many things being introduced to us, the students. most of the newly introduced thingy are related to us since rules and students are symbiotic. rules complete a student's life. muahaha. sadly, the newly introduced rules are not so friendly to us. I sincerely agree to each and every rules introduced by our college such as;


  1. We have to leave our matric card at the guard post before going out.
  2.  We need to come back before 11pm.
  3. We must register our transportation. 
  4. We have to collect our matric card within 24hours or else they will send it to HEP.
  5. etc
But, there's one thing that I do not agree. I completely do not agree. holistically do not agree. lagi ada words yang explain 'completely'. the management. 

how to start eyh. we have to get our warden/fellow's signature every time we want to leave  our college for more than 24 hours. they provide each of us with a card. mine is a yellow card.not really a card. they simply photocopy and fold like a brochure. a few months ago, we needed to get our fellow's signature but since most of the teacher trainees are smarter than the HEP buddies, we managed to duplicate their signature. yelah. It's just as simply as doodling a letter on the box that indicates the date. When they discovered it, they decided to change it into making us get our warden's stamp. haha. i find it ridiculous. why? because we have to sent our card every week for that and it adds up the burden for our warden. haish. i can smell bias. just imagine! They have to do the same thing over and over again for a few hundreds of not so young students.

just imagine! lepas tu tak jumpa pulak warden sebab warden bz. tak boleh keluar.

they successfully drive us crazy.  I don't mind if they manage to prepare a better system just like in a real tertiary level institute. just scan and go. easy aite. the guards can monitor the progress as well. no one hurts. they waste nothing. they might have to spent a lot but in the end, it helps them to save a lot too. 

matric card is another issue. Now, after four years of holding the tile of teacher trainee, I have collected three matric cards. hihi.

Guards are another issue. they treat us like prisoners. Prisoners of IPG. that sounds like a novel/ movie title. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. I think most of us, college students, have used to shouts and bad words from our guards. I experienced a few times. For me, they were doing their job at that time but they should not use harsh words to initiate a conversation with a human being. I always chose to shut my mouth coz a war might explode if I chose to open my mouth. respect. respect. respect. that's the only key to success. as a saying goes, what you give, you get back. Better keep silent.

They are given the power to give compound letter to students who parked their car suka hati. It's okay to give compound coz that's their job but please, tak kan letak kereta sekejap sangat tepi cafe kena compound or clamp the tires.  

looking at a brighter side. it may not last forever. I truly agree with the new system and the rules but please, plan how to carry out the new rules so it won't hurt and burden many souls.

enforcing some rules are easy but the process of carrying it out might take some time.

Listen to the voices of tomorrow. They might have better ideas to improve the rules and the way the HEP unit enforcing the new rules.

Akhirnya, I managed to get away from the place with some help from the seniors. It's study week now so most of us plan to go home but we actually couldn't. Kalau hanta kad kuning, kantoi xbalik maktab waktu week days. Most of us have done with classes but they want us to be in the college. nak keluar? terpaksa main trick. cara kotor. ampun!

alhamdulillah, i'm safely home. safe and sound.

Semoga bakal anak di masa hadapan tidak terikut dengan perangai yang nakai ni.

Untuk adik-adik yang nak jadi cikgu,
IPG and boarding school are almost similar. haha. yelah, they train us to be teachers. They train us to enjoy and feel the responsibility of teachers and the hectic, boring life  of a student in school. Stop bragging! Once you choose to become primary school teachers and choose to be part of IPGs, you're so close to school system. so close. far by an inch only.


the end.

nah! gambar kecekguan satu.


regards,
a student teacher

Friday, 25 October 2013

teaching aids exhibition.

assalamualaikum,

since, i'm so keen into writing tonight. please, let my fingers clicking some more.

i want to make a report about the exhibition lah since i had nothing to talk about. haha. yeah no current issues unless i became so weird till i myself could feel the weirdness. nak makan macam2. pemalas nak study. rasa nak kahwin. haish. lempang pipi laju-laju. sabar. esok nak puasa! hahaha.. Does it a natural feeling for a growing up lady like me? ish, i dunno. need to seek advice from a psychiatrist very soon.

let's get back to the story. owh, it's exhibition. it's teaching aids exhibition. we had it at our so called new block. not so new nor so old but that's the newest block and the most canggih one in this college.

I was one of the committe member for my cohort. We had a jumbo exhibition. jumbo? a combination of my cohort and my senior, TESOL. owh, they just came back from Oz. Talking about TESL AND TESOL, i still remembered when we're fighting for our cohort names. It's not easy to explain but since I feel really free right now, I just want to explain a little bit about the chronicles of teslians. Before this, our beloved government send 2 batches of our seniors to Oz for two years under TESOL program, but, something happened. We're not so lucky. They decided to put a full stop to the idea of doing twinning program with overseas universities and they proudly introduces my cohort's program, TESL. gitu. that's a little bit about TESOL AND TESL in my college. if you wanna know more about the differences between TESL and TESOL, google could be the best helper to search for the valid information. If I let myself do the explanation, half of it might be fake. haha.

so, we exhibited what we did for our assignments on material design. materials and teachers could not be separated. a good teacher must put some effort to prepare teaching materials. A lazy teacher could just go into a classroom and use the materials provided by the government. kata para pensyarah. haha. I dunno what to say coz i might be one sooner. haha. it's not easy to prepare teaching aids. Buying was not a good idea coz it's not easy to claim from school administration. I spent so much on teaching aids in terms of money and time. Sleepless nights and empty pockets were two things that came in together into a teacher trainee life.

That's why, I had nothing to complain about each and every booth. Each of us had shown our effort through the masterpieces and it's so unfair if there were people who dared to complain. Not all teachers were so creative that they could produce their own big books and puppets and so on so forth. sincerely, i felt very proud if a male teacher could produce at least some simple teaching aids. Some of them were forced to join this arena and we're lacking of male teachers. Therefore, we need to put special remarks and congratulate for whatever they did. hehe. i'm not being stereotyped but we needed more boys in teaching arena.

but, for us, the local students, we had been trained to prepare those materials since we were in the earlier stages of degree journey. As compare to our seniors, they had no enough training in terms of that and they had very limited chance to be in the real situation. Meaning, they had very limited chances to practice the theories that they had learnt in class in the real Malaysian situation. yelah, they had only three moths in school and that's all. We, the local program students, were given a few trial sessions to be in the real classrooms and to try the different methods and theories that we had learnt during lectures. Eh, merepek apa ni.

hurm, i did not take any pictures. hehe. blame on the phone. i woke up late. i was in rush and i forgot my camera. my phone camera. ahahaha. i'm not a gadget freak. eh, gitu pulak? xdelah, soon, phone canggih akan muncul. now, i could still hold my nafsu to own a new up to date gadget.

no picture.just words.

i made a big book made of card boards and felt cloth. it cost me 10 ringgit plus minus. it was not an easy wheezy job. i made stick puppets to go along with the big book. The students used the stick puppets during the production stage where they needed to do some role play.

My cohort members did a very well and excellent job. They made stick puppets, hand puppets, diorama and so many superb teaching aids which I believed, had cost them a lot of money and time.

I really hope the spirit to prepare the teaching aids in order to enhance students' understanding could last forever till the end of the time to serve the nation.

If it stop at teacher trainee institute, the knowledge that each and everyone of us had gained could be consider as useless.

till then.

regards,
an observer


musing of a hormonal lady

assalamualaikum,

something makes me think that there's something wrong with me. identity conflict. i just don't know what conflict. the closer the time, the lazy i am.

i had an exhibition in the morning until 12. I had promised to myself that once I reached my room, I would quickly clean up and start doing revision. time is running. i did but only for an hour and then, i started to do nothing but dreaming. seronoknya dreaming wei.

i ate 2 packets of nasi lemak and lunch some more. i took all the leftover tea with me. perghh. i took three bungkus (eyh, how to say in English ek) and drank all to myself. while i was doing my revision, i started to think about food. yes, again! i dunno what happen to me. lucky, a friend of mine asked me to sent her to bus station and i quickly agreed coz i had a plan to run. i planned to visit Queensbay mall for food retreat. i dunno why. i just wanted to eat sushi. it appeared everywhere even in my dream last night. i should not wait no more. Deep inside my brain, i hoped i could concentrate more on my revision after residing all the foods listed in my stomach.

i was lucky, my friend decided to join me and took a later bus. actually, I planned to be a lone ranger. i dunno why. my heart wanted it to be that way. that's why i say there's something wrong with me.

Since it was already time for Asar prayer, we decided to pray first.

 i felt weird over my own behaviours. I suddenly wanted to eat so many things. I ate nasi three times a day. Today, I bought sushi from Jusco since Sushi King was under renovation. I felt like crying when I saw the sign 'we're under renovation' coz i had planned earlier to eat there. pelik kan? pelik giler. my behaviour was and still weird.

hormonal lady..who's fault? Is that what people called exam fever?Are they the effect of exam oriented system?

I bought subway some more. My friend bought something from Dave's Deli.

Tiba2, we both reminisced when was our first time walking into such food franchises since both of us were coming from a not so big city. haha. orang kampung.

and now, i dunno what to do. i just came back from a story telling session at my friends'. i told them that i felt weird over my own behaviour.

I needed to escape. I don't care, I must go home once my class ended tomorrow. let's see how it goes. hormonal lagi x?

my only hope is owh please, i need the spirit to stay concentrate on the examinations.

three papers to wrap up this sem. how to warp everything up and start a holiday peacefully without preparation.

i guess problem will always arise especially when the exam is just around the corner.

tensionnya. rasa nak lempang pipi sendiri. study syahira!

now, i feel like eating ice cream.

am i pregnant? pregnant with tapeworms, i guess? balik rumah nak makan ubat cacing.

regards,
syahirayangtengahemosi.






Wednesday, 23 October 2013

tabib

assalamualaikum,

eyh. datang lagi.

i was commenting about gov hospital in the previous post.

tadi terjumpa ni.

rasa kesian pulaks. ish2. so sad.

bacalah.

we might not know.

we might not know.
you might don't know.
you don't want to know
i want to know.

people, here and there, are talking about the quality of our gov hospital services, doctors and so on and so forth.they are referring to one person without knowing that there are a few thousand (or might be millions) who are struggling for us sincerely and not only for money and title. rasa kesian pulak dekat doktor. but, what to do. in the end, i would say, that's your job. to serve the nation sincerely regardless of time and whatever limitations.

xpela, lepas ni cikgu akan berkerja keras untuk make sure ramai budak-budak bercita-cita dan berusaha untuk jadi doktor. haha. boleh? iA.

nanti berebut pulak nak penempatan kerja?

ish2. dunia..dunia..

till then.



mimpi di siang hari yang normal. huhu

assalamualaikum,

post ni tak bermanfaat. untuk orang yang skema!!! haha.. lari!!!!

perghh. first time rasa minggu belajar (study week) ibarat penantian tiada pengakhiran.

dogaan terbesar.

nak study tekun sangat. cell rajin tak fuel up lagi.

tiba-tiba terfikir. adakah ini dugaan terbesar ku? haha

yes! the answeer is yes. inilah cobaan.

tengah study. fikiran melayang ke udara luas.

nak kawin dengan siapakah gerangan 'guy'?hahaha

anak nama apa? siap coret2 lagi kot nama anak. punyala xdak reja.

memang konsentrasi untuk study sikit je. hampes.

esok nak study dekat library. nak try test. soalan cepuk mas mcm tu muncul tak dari minda sedar ni.

lalu, semalam kaki ni melangkah ke usrah. alhamdulillah. akhirnya, berguna jua masa2 minggu belajar dengan perkara bermanfaat. haha

kami pun sembang tentang hadis 4

Daripada Abu Abdul Rahman Abdullah ibn Mas'uud r.a. beliau berkata: Rasulullah SAW telah bersabda, dan Baginda adalah seorang yang benar lagi dibenarkan (iaitu dipercayai):
Sesungguhnya setiap orang di kalangan kamu dihimpunkan kejadiannya dalam perut ibunya selama 40 hari berupa air mani, kemudian menjadi segumpal darah selama tempoh yang sama, kemudian menjadi seketul daging selama tempoh yang sama, kemudian dikirimkan kepadanya seorang malaikat lalu dia menghembuskan padanya ruh dan dia diperintahkan dengan 4 kalimat; iaitu supaya menulis rezekinya, ajalnya, amalannya dan adakah dia celaka atau bahagia. Demi Allah Yang tiada Tuhan melainkanNya, sesungguhnya salah seorang dari kalangan kamu akan beramal dengan amalan ahli syurga, sehingga jarak antaranya dan syurga tidak lebih dari sehasta, lalu dia didahului oleh ketentuan tulisan kitab lantas dia mengerjakan amalan ahli neraka lalu dia memasuki neraka. Dan sesungguhnya salah seorang dari kalangan kamu akan beramal dengan amalan ahli neraka, sehingga jarak antaranya dengan neraka tidak lebih dari sehasta, lalu dia didahului oleh ketentuan tulisan kitab lantas dia mengerjakan amalan ahli syurga lalu dia memasuki syurga.
 Hadis riwayat al-lmam al-Bukhari dan al-lmam Muslim (Al-Imam al-Bukhari meriwayatkannya dalam (بدءالخلق (باب ذآر الملئكة) ) nombor 3036, dan dalam ( القدر ) dan dalam ( الأنبياء ) . Al-Imam Muslim meriwayatkannya di awal kitab ( القدر ) bab ( باب آيفية خلق الآدمي ) nombor 2643.).

Tahukah anda!

jodoh kita telah ada di sana.

tau. tapi ish..ish.. nak fikir jugak.

balik dari usrah. terus berazam. xmau dh fikir.

sebabnya. sepanjang study week ni. hari-hari fikir tapi xjumpa jawapan. habis buat sudoku, makan kerepek 2 balang, makan nasi tengahari dan malam. aip. xjumpa lagi jawapan siapa gerangan jodohku? haha.

sampai bilik. terus bukak buku nota. tulis superb besaq. lek lu!!! muda lagi. hehe.

xmau dh fikir pasal jodoh. satgi xjadi nk study. boleh berangan sampai 24 jam. haha.

ini hakikat.

bukan salahku.

salahkan mereka2 yang kawin awal. yang rancak merancang hari bahagia di usia 22. tidak!!!

they make me thinking. huhu.

marilah kita lebih berwawasan.

lepas degree. master pulak!!!!

exam lagi 2 minggu. lamanya!!!!

doakan saya. weeee!!

the end. =)

Friday, 18 October 2013

Aidil adha

assalamualaikum,

it has been a while since my last post.

bulan ni ialah bulan penghapusan doa.

it started with food poisoning. a few days before aidil adha, i was completely down with fever. two days before aidiladha, my sis brought me to the hospital since the doc in a clinic told me that my temperature was very high. up to 40 degree. she gave me two options. injection to reduce my body temperature or going to the hospital for blood test. we chose the second option.

i was half awake when we reached at the hospital. the handsome doctor kept on asking me a few question s before they injected  and do whatever they wanted to do.

bila dah masuk air, my body temperature dropped a bit to 39.7. the doctor kept on coming to check on my condition. rimas pun ada. elok2 nk lelap, one by one would come to check on my bp lah, temperature lah and so on and so forth.

yang pasti, i was fully awake when the doctor yelled at an uncle who was next to me and suddenly, i heard a women cried so loudly and the doctor splurged into the waiting room saying that 'ada orang mati'. hehe. sungguh relax suaranya as if it was just a normal scenery.

my only prayer was 'jangan kena warded' coz i hated the creepy scenery and things that happened around me. everyone was in rushing with the not so happy faces.

it's gonna be my first and last experience in the hospital. i won't go and i'll pray hard not to fall sick again and once i get my first salary, the first thing that i would want to do will be insurance thingy. medical card. i won't go to gov hospital. i hated the way the doctors treated their patients.

people won't go to the hospital for fun. they're there because they're sick.

my sis told me that she had a conversation with a nurse.

my sister : doktor india tu nk keje ke tak nak, layan mcm xnak layan je.
nurse      : biasala dik, doktor hospital gov tak sama macam hospital swasta. lagi sikit patient datang lagi                         bagus. gaji tetap masuk setiap bulan.

entah, tak tau nak cakap apa.

-------------------------------------

tak habis lagi,
belum lagi baik demam,
measles took charge my body. oh my antibody. 

---------------------------------------

yang pasti,
it was a sad Aidil Adha. I was still sick. since the doctor asked me not to go anywhere and never even go outside the house boundary, that was what I do.

no baju raya.
nothing. it was just like a usual day.

hari ni, dah berlalu hari tasyriq.
the end. 

i wish i could revisit the days that I missed.
but time flies. it won't stop. 

semoga bertemu lagi Aidil Adha yang penuh bermakna.
jom daftar haji!   

till then,